The following is the text of the sermon preached Thursday, July 4, by Pete Kaltenbaugh. The text was submitted to the Annual Conference Office in mid-June and may have been modified for the actual presentation. Pete Kaltenbaugh Focus: Accepting one another Title: "Who is welcome at the table?" Scripture: Luke 4:14-30 1996 Church of the Brethren Annual Conference, Cincinnati, Ohio. July 4, 1996 As a young boy growing up in Western Pennsylvania, I looked forward to the family reunions. Family members coming together from all over. Why, some even lived outside our county or adjoining counties; places mentioned in stories or reported on the news. To a small boy in the early fifties the world was still unknown and filled with mystery. We would gather on the fourth Sunday in July in a grove owned by a great uncle and the afternoon and evening were filled with food, games, recitations, a hymn sing, and just old fashioned visiting. This day would reconnect the family, catching up on all the news, business and gossip of a year. Yet, I remember the eating, gathering at the long tables of which there were two, filled with people, jostlin' for space, askin' for something to be passed, and just plain havin' a good time. There were dishes too hot to be passed, there were beans that bubbled with brown sugared scents, potato salad tangy from the mustard, eggs - pickled and deviled, and desserts so good-looking it was almost sinful to eat them, but we did. In that environment my understanding of family and acceptance began. I had naturally assumed that all families were like that. In those developmental years I did not know what divorce meant or the pain it caused. I did not understand being separated from one's family, except for the occasional visits with Grandmaw... while another!! baby was added to our ever-growing family. I only perceived what now surely looks like innocence. I will always remember being part of that large family reunion numbering over 100 people. And I still remember hearing those beautiful words, when someone who had been away, came to the reunion, or someone who was a visitor asked "Who's boy is that?". And one or both of my parents would say, "That's our boy." What acceptance, I was theirs; they wanted me they claimed me I was part of this family. The family was never stagnant. It changed with marriage, with births, with visitors, even with death. Yet I always felt there was room at the table. Everyone was invited. I look back and remember a great uncle who was mentally challenged, not frightening, not shunned, just a little different, but included; a cousin who was adopted didn’t make him any less of a cousin; a cousin with leukemia; an uncle with a cane; or in later years a grandfather with an artificial leg. There was a cousin without a husband, yet with a baby, a concept that everyone knew wasn't right but yet they were invited to the table. They weren't shunned nor were they marked for life. The visitor, the suitor, even the separated spouses could come. The alcoholic, the dreamer without work, the doctor, the teacher, the single parent, the adulterer, the minister, the recently released-from-jail, the missionary, the lawyer, the housewife, the coal miner, the retired, all came and ate and shared. Perfection? No. Just people with faults and achievements, good and bad habits, clear and cloudy thoughts, and a concept of family. Plain and simple, they were family. They were accepted. Even as a child I knew what wasn't right. You could be at the table and be one of the family, yet the way you lived wasn't accepted as right. And while at the table you had rules to follow, manners to observe and even a guest or suitor could be in for an explanation of table behavior. I just assumed, in my child-like innocence, that everyone or everyone's family was just like that. How did I know any different? Going to church was like going to a family gathering. I heard words that seemed to stress the same values as in my family. Honesty, love, truthfulness, belonging and even joining. As a youth I heard the invitation, felt the draw of the Holy Spirit and wanted to belong to Jesus’ family. The church explained that baptism was a rebirth into a new life and that I would now belong. No one mentioned a trial period or a time of initiation. I understood that at baptism I would be one with the others who had chosen Jesus as their Lord and Savior. Those words struck a chord in me and at age twelve I was baptized along with a 1/2 dozen or more cousins into this new family. I didn't realize it at the time, but one of the girls who shared that water that day, would also become real close family - as my wife - 10 years later. However, I must ask if baptism was enough for me to be accepted by those who I assumed would now become my brothers and sisters in Christ... Oh yes, my name was on the rolls. I was now officially a member of the congregation and of the denomination but was I accepted? Was I really a part of this family? What more would I need to do to fit the mantel that some seemed to have and others didn't. I could help in church projects, belong to the youth group, attend regularly and even contribute to the best of my ability. However, somehow it didn't seem to fit. As a youth, I didn't understand, yet I tried harder and was faithful. God called unto me and I was being interviewed for licensing in the Church of the Brethren. However, it was quite evident that the interviewers were more concerned with where I had come from, than where I was and the direction I was headed. They quickly let me know that I was not one of them. Yet, because of a few Christ-like men on the interviewing committee...what my father did, or the opinions of some of the family about the church, did not stop the licensing process. Yet I knew that I wasn't one of them. I was there, but not accepted. For a variety of reasons my parents didn’t quite fit the mold. Oh, it was their choice, their membership was listed, but their acceptance hadn’t been officially attached. Now I have discovered in the years since being licensed in 1966, that we Brethren don't hold the corner on acceptance or non-acceptance. I have worked with two other denominations and discovered that being accepted or not sometimes deals with whether you were born with the right name or in the right part of town. And the new guy may have only lived in the neighborhood for 22 years and they aren’t quite sure of him yet. Or they aren't related to half the congregation so how can they really fit in? Yet this isn't something unique to this generation...... Jesus, in the experience from Luke 4 that you heard read a few minutes ago, talked about the same thing. He, that being Jesus, was back home. He had been out and about in Galilee. He had taught in synagogues, their places of public worship. For here they gathered not for ceremonial services but for moral acts of devotion to read, expound, and apply the word. For the word was important. Here they would come to pray and praise. However, this day they had heard the words of Isaiah being read. They also heard Jesus speak after the scroll had been given back and were admiring his gracious words, good words. words that increased their wonderment, yet there was more. They began to question how this could be from one they knew all about....Why isn't this Joseph's son? How could He know so much...we know His education...His background...they were not very accepting. Oh, yes, he belonged....name on the rolls....but not accepted. He wasn't going to dazzle them to get them to accept Him. He simply knew He wasn't accepted in His own home town. He goes on to point out how two of the most famous prophets of the Old Testament chose to dispense their favors among others than just the Jews. He angered them by showing them that God's favor or His miracles weren't given by private respect but according to God's wise appointment. They were so angered after such a short time of hearing His gracious words. We can only guess at what set them off. Some idea that this one, who came from them but not of them, would have the audacity to suggest they weren't going to get God's blessings. Why, weren't they the right denomination, hadn't they followed the book, hadn’t they been true to themselves and sometimes even to God? Just what base ideal did Jesus trample upon we can only guess. But He surely found out that He wasn't accepted. He didn't fit their role that they had for Him. They were like the gift-giver who gets angry that the piece of clothing they purchased for the loved one doesn't fit. Somehow it is your fault that your size doesn't fit the material purchased. Sounds silly; yet we in the church try to do the same thing. We many times have already decided what will fit or what is acceptable. We don't want anything to change. Paul in his letter to the group at Rome uses Old Testament scripture from a number of different sources to encourage the Jewish Christians to assimilate the Gentile Christians into their fellowship. Encouraged them to tear down the barriers and welcome, accept and affirm their sisters and brothers in Christ. Yet 1900 years later we still have barriers, concepts and customs that keep family members from being accepted. Now, that doesn't mean I am saying to change scripture or ignore God's word so people can be or feel accepted. I am suggesting that we can do better at what we do or how we try to make families feel accepted. Allow me to illustrate: There is this congregation who hasn't grown much for the last decade. They continue to survive the changing world around them. If you attended there 30 years ago, you could walk back in today and pick up just about where you walked out. However, not too long ago someone made a radical suggestion. They suggested having two worship services on Sunday morning instead of just one. The second service would be different from the original; more contemporary in music, structure of worship and the use of different musical instruments. Not anything against scripture or polity: Just some changes that they hoped might attract younger families from their community. A trial period was established and two services began. During this time period, attendance increased, the amount of visitors doubled. They did receive new families, and an excitement was clearly evident in those attending. Yet at the congregational business meeting the proposal to keep the two services ongoing was defeated. Traditionalists didn't like people going to two services. They didn't like not knowing who was attending the other service. And that old stand-by reason: If one service was good enough all these years for us, one service can be good enough for them as well. Now contrast that congregation with another congregation who opens up their doors, not just to another service but to another denomination. While one is in the sanctuary, the other is in the classrooms. At an appointed time the groups switch. What is extra special, is that during that switching time, older, gray haired, supposedly unchangeable family members move to the Fellowship Hall - the cross roads, and greet those present. Making persons feel accepted, like one of the family. How does your congregation work at making individuals and families feel like they belong? Do you allow the acceptance to be one sided? I mean.. ..do you.... wait till they ask about the congregation or beg for information and then finally let them in on, all the secrets? Or do you go out of your way to include, welcome and accept? And do you include everyone or do you make a decision who you'll ask and who you might ignore on some worldly standard like how well they dress or what kind of car they drive you say that doesn't happen. Then I say praise the Lord for that particular miracle where you're living or I'll pray that your eyes be opened. Too often our congregations are like the animals from the movie "Babe." We have already decided how it is. The sheep are dumb, the wolves are brutes; that is the way it is. Well in the whimsical movie everyone learned they didn't have all the answers, and some of the answers they had were completely wrong. Yet today in this world we live in, many have not discovered the answers. It is like they are in the dark. And if you're in the dark you can't see very well. In the Church World Services' new booklet of jubilee prayers with global partners, entitled "For the Healing of the Nations: Celebrating 50 years of help and hope since 1946," comes this wonderful tale found on the 25th day. It was taken from the one of the Tales of the Hasidim: An old rabbi once asked his pupils how they could tell when the night had ended and the day had begun. "Could it be," asked one student, "when you can see an animal in the distance and tell whether it's a sheep or a dog?" "No," answered the rabbi. Another asked, "Is it when you can look at a tree in the distance and tell whether it’s a fig tree or a peach tree?" "No," answered the rabbi. "Then when is it?" the pupils demanded. "It is when you can look on the face of any woman or man and see that it is your sister or brother. Because if you cannot see this, it is still night." And some congregations are still in the dark they haven't seen the faces and realized that those who have come are their sisters and brothers. However, allow me to also say that some individuals and families, even after all the congregation has done - and sometimes that is really a lot - they still don’t feel accepted. They feel alienated and separate and consciously, as well as sometimes unconsciously, it does happen. In those cases some very open discussion needs to happen and allow the Holy Spirit to work. Yet there are some families who want to be unconnected, for with being accepted/connected there comes responsibility and commitments. Some want to simply be accepted to be at the table without responsibility. They want everything they do or believe to be accepted. Don't judge anything about me - just completely accept me. Yet even as a child growing up in Pennsylvania, and most certainly as an adult, I understand we are all invited and welcomed to come to the table. However, practices or decisions contrary to the one making the invitation will not be accepted. We must decide, just as a young boy had to, if we are to be accepted at the table then we must follow the rules that have been set. However, too often we want to challenge the rules so they will change just for us. We want it our way; no other way will do. We decide what is right. Somehow we forget that our Heavenly Father has already established the way it should be. Now please don't misunderstand me I am not saying that we should unconditionally swallow everything without looking at it but let's quit trying to have God condone our sins as acceptable. The greatest invitation is offered to all; we will be accepted - our sins will not be accepted - so let us begin to mature in Jesus and change our ways. Let me share an incident from my early childhood while visiting with a cousin. Lunchtime came and the food was prepared and we were called in to wash our hands and be seated at the table. Upon arriving, I saw that Aunt Grace Mary had given each of us two boys a half of a banana. I told her I wanted a whole banana. She explained that she had one banana and split it between the two of us. I didn't seem to care, I wanted what I wanted. She heard my words, and then reached over, peeled my half of the banana, and ate it. Shocked, I stood by the chair until she invited me to sit down for lunch. I was still accepted and welcome at the table but my behavior wasn't accepted nor would it be tolerated. The invitation is offered for all of us to come sit at the table. And we will find that God will accept all of us, but our incorrect behavior will not be accepted. So understand, as we are loved and accepted, our sins - and we all have them - will not be. So let's not try to force God, the church, or the congregation, to accept that which we know God says is unacceptable. Come to the table, share your ideas, be open to growth and change but know God is the same yesterday, today and tomorrow. God doesn't change to be accepted, we must change to be accepted by Him. For the invitation is offered. Will you come, will you receive what He offers, and be accepted? ------------------------------------------------------------------------- Peter Kaltenbaugh is the pastor of Hartville (Ohio) Church of the Brethren. 1996 Annual Conference, Cincinnati, Ohio July 4, 1996